Mexico Finally Agrees to Pay for Border Wall… to ‘Keep Sick Americans Out’

In a surprising announcement on Monday, the White House stated Mexico will pay for a wall to separate their country from the United States.

“Mexico has agreed to fund the wall, just as President Trump had promised more than three years ago,” a statement from the administration read. “Promises made, promises kept.”

Mexican President Andrés Manuel López Obrador said he now sees this as a win win. “After going over the numbers, we have agreed to pay for every brick,” he said. “Americans get their wall and we get to keep Americans from coming here to infect our citizens.”

Supporters of President Trump were ecstatic about the news.

“I told you, I told everyone,” said Jim Landry of Louisiana. “He faked those COVID numbers to trick them Mexican boys into doing exactly what he wanted. This is pure 4-D chess.”